Getting Stood Up

That is never a good feeling. Here are the sad, embarrassing details...

Jackie and I planned to go on a cabin trip this past weekend in Virginia. The plans were extremely shifty and flaky, as usual. I talk about Jackie in The Date and in This Is Why They Don't Call . Of course, I overlook the flakes and go with my emotions, after having a lovely evening together and wanting to do it again.

The cabin trip was to last from Friday through Sunday morning. I told Jackie I was going to go to VA on Thursday in order to visit WL#1. She lives in Northern VA, 3hours from my parents home in NJ and 4 hours from our cabin. A perfect halfway point and addition to my weekend adventure. I arrived at WL#1's home and we started evaluating Jackie's flaky actions. Here is what I had been dealing with:

1. Taking forever to book a cabin and then doing it the night before I leave.

2. Receiving text messages not pertaining to the cabin, but instead emotional commentary.

3. Late night phone calls.

4. A whole lot of talk and not enough action.

As I got into bed anxious for the following day I decided that this cabin trip would be the last thing I did with Jackie for good, because he was way too complicated for me. I believe that any bond you have with a person should be a give and take and not leave you wondering constantly about the status of the relationship.

I woke up at 7am and my sixth sense was punching me in the stomach. After stewing on all the possibilities for a few hours I finally got up to take a shower and hopefully wash away my worries. When I got out of the shower, I looked at my phone and saw that I had a series of text messages from Jackie. The accumulated messages stated that he was very sorry because he had to go to Tennessee for a last minute job interview for the position of Associate Dean of a University. He could not reschedule with them and felt bad about canceling our trip. He did not want to hear the disappointment in my voice so hence the text messages and he would call me right before the interview which was to be at 2pm.

WTF! Ladies, I felt like I had been left at the alter. 3 hours and $50 dollars worth of gas and tolls had been wasted on this piece of shit of a man. I texted back three words.

Lose My Number

I sat on WL#1's bed for 30minutes thinking about my next move. I beat myself up for falling so easily into the hands of a player and thought about how I was going to tell my readers. WL#1 was a saint. We sat and talked for another hour so I would be calm enough to drive 3 hours back to NJ. The weather mirrored my mood perfectly. Water aggressively hit my windshield and several cars lined the highway with tow trucks behind them. Then there was me, tightly gripping the steering wheel and replaying the week events and conversations with Jackey over and over in my head.

When I got home I talked to my mother and she told me to send an email so that he knows he can not do that to other friends. So I did. I have a problem with always trying to be nice to people. Well this time I let that go and let him have it. I still don't feel good. I am hurt, but of course I learned plenty from the situation.

1. Do not put your guard down too quickly. Even if they SEEM to really be a good person. Its events like these that make us not trust the opposite sex. So do not allow yourself to get into a situation where you ended up hating an entire gender because of one person's stupid and awful actions.

2. If the signs are there do not take them for granted. Just because the person says the right things, does not mean they will follow them up with action. A few examples: Texts throughout the day, phone calls late at night, never making plans, creating excuses for their actions or lack of action more than once.

3. Allow the opposite sex you are interested in plan the ENTIRE date or event to show that they are actually in for good. Once again actions speak louder than words. People must show FULL commitment within a situation.

I don't believe Jackey's Tennessee crap for an instant or anything else he told me in the course of these three weeks that we were in contact. Luckily, I still have a bit of faith in the male race. So Sistayvonne is on the prowl once more. Stay on the lookout.